I wish my cat could text because i would tell him that everything will be ok. and i wish he could send them back..but him have no thumbs. him no know what he would text with.
i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
He's engaged. If the world's smallest penis can find true love than I can too.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
I slept with him because his girlfriend should know better than to be with him given is reputation. It was like sex and a lesson all in one.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Do not tell me that that is not the face of a man who has sex with goats.
You told her that she shouldn't be allowed to wear clothes then when her roommate asked if you like her you said "no I just want to insert things into her"
I stand by it.
What I've learned from glowsticks: glowing things are not safe to eat
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
I feel like I put a fire out with my hand but idk if that was a dream or not
He managed to rip my nipple last night....
He just got out of surgery, almost died from shooting him self with an arrow.
Randomize
