i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
stalking is really helping my grade.. I followed him to a review session tonight
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
I think I have vodka in my lungs
We're sitting in his room writing songs about America. There's a verse about a dead dog. There's tequila everywhere.
Shes definitely an expert at this. Her happy hour goes from 4 to 11, then she starts drinking heavy. She also allots 15 minutes each hour for a pee/bj break
That was an excessively violent trivia night
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I started rolling down the window so he pulled into a gas station and i puked all over the side of the car while some dude stared at me. I waved and we drove away
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Should I be scared that after we hooked up she took antibiotics with Sailor Jerry's?!
holy shit I just remembered that story I told about Tom hanks going bowling while high.
It's becoming clear to me that I am not sugar baby material. I don't think I could handle old balls long term.
you woke me up at 1am last night high on cough syrup to tell me jay z was an idiot for cheating on beyonce
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