We walked past a group of guys in front of a bar last night and they claimed, I quote: Wow, we'd actually have to work for that.
dude she has hot friends.. do you want blonde brunette or red head.. maybe asian?
what is this build-a-bear? .. just gimme one thats breathing
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I was gonna make fun of her but that plan kinda stopped once she put my dick in her mouth
Writing apology letters and leaving them on peoples doors for your actions is NOT what I want to be doing at 6am.
was his dick as big as our hopes and dreams?
dude Steve you don't even know. its just been one hairy asshole after another.
I'm glad I get the same reaction from you for cookies and for my naked body
Think I just subconsciously wanted a cigarette and started sleep walking to Carl's.. Didn't realize what I was doing until I found myself in an elevator.
I'm so busy i barely have time to have sex with myself. I have to talk myself into it like an old married couple.
He? As in you personified your dick?
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
