S and I had anal without a condom because I'm on my rag but he didn't finish. Should I still take Plan B?
Free beer happened. I got hammered and aaron did his first keg stand. Then went all martha stewart on redecorating the bathroom. I remember being at walmart
What theme did he decide on for the bathroom?
Well as you know martha loves the northeast this time of year. I believe the theme was 'coney island' decorrated with hot dogs and macaroni
Just saw a cop issuing a DUI. At 3 pm. It's definitely the start of winter break.
He gave me a pearl necklace on top of my Karma necklace I was wearing. I guess I deserve whats coming to me.
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
I just remember her telling me "Hi, my names Kaissa and I'm a lesbian" over and over and over and over again as I was crying.
So I woke up in a strange bed with a note taped to my arm giving me directions back to my brothers apartment.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
I think my staff loses a little bit of respect for me every time you're in town. I may have to puke at work ...again.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
You pulled out a fucking recorder and started playing along with all the songs on your playlist and refused to hit the j
What would you say is a healthy ratio of sex vs. being called a fucking asshole in a relationship?
My roommate walked in naked grabbed my hand and pulled me into her room to see her randoms dick.
Doing coke by yourself isn't as fun. Even when you're watching a James Franco movie.
I woke up in a warehouse with the words “Property of Adam” written on my chest in frosting.
Randomize
