Culvers...So Good
So good. The butter burgers slip right outta my ass.
The vibrating part of my dildo broke, now I have to rely on gyration.
She told me she only masterbates to Kenny Rogers songs.
OMG. What did u say?
I told her I did too.
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
people would bow to what i just did to her vagina
@ a funeral. fucking miss uuuu
there may or may not be knives in your bed. I would check
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
It sounded like he said "don't stop" but all I could hear were his balls.
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
I woke up with an eye patch on, someone else's sweatshirt on, and no pants on. I hope it was a good night.
i hooked up with all four beatles on halloween get on my level
Randomize
