I just threw up in a patch of wild flowers on the side of the road. I never knew rock bottom was so beautiful.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
She sent me a pic of shot glasses on fire if that tells you anything
That's why they call him "the cheesegrater".
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
If you have shit your pants within the past two years, please take a seat.
Apparently I really was petting a bunny named lazarus in Jimmy Johns last night.
He's not messing around tonight. 4 fist pumps.
Might be using my graduation money to pay for an abortion.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
After we hooked up, his roommate shouted "I LIKE TO HAVE SEX TOO" from across the apartment
He told me that after two hours of fucking he feels as though his dick wants to detach from his body and go to Mexico..
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
I let a 30 year old guitar player that works at a call center go down on me in his backseat last night
Thanks for not letting me get involved with a serial killer. That's true friendship
Randomize