the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
i get tired of guys telling me there married or they have a girlfriend. they act like it concerns or matters to me
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
Either way you look at it, I'm a slut. But either way I look at it, I'm having a fucking blast.
We left an ass print on the piano.
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
The moment you realize you should grow up: you're snorting your fathers percocet script with your old health insurance card, while your parents are on a 10 day cruise in the carribean...
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
It'll be a pair of asscheeks that light up when they're summoned.
last thing I remember is yelling 'sit on my face' through a traffic cone
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
Fun fact. I just wrapped myself in wrapping paper for a sext. Is this a new high or a new low stay tuned.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
It's 6am and I had to explain to the gas station attendant why I didn't have shoes on and I'm covered in maple syrup.
Randomize
