I specifically asked you not to be slutty tonight.
Saw a pregnant woman get a lap dance last night. I love the south.
beer for lunch on the first day back to school.... too soon?
The stories of what you did in Cuba got home before you.
this kid just offered me adderall in exchange for my meal points. college at its finest
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Just used an eyelash curler to open my beer since I didn't have a bottle opener. Things are starting to look up.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
WE HAD GREAT SEX AND I HATE MYSELF FOR IT
You know you need to get it together when a frat guy wakes you up and says you need to go to class
Dude i'm still drunk and i'm feeding a raccoon cereal from my bedroom window
Need advice bro. Which one should I take: the blonde devil crying in the corner or the brunette crawling on the floor acting like a dinosaur??
I would but he’s not speaking to me because I put ketchup in his socks.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
