They say you shouldnt they say its no good for the environment in your vagina
the crazy preacher outside Willard just began a monologue that began with "when i look at a vagina." We should stop by there more often
Is moral bankruptcy something you need to file for?
What type of outfit says "I know you slept with my boyfriend before and are also way skinnier than me, but I look better...somehow"
Just found out they make medicinal lollipops, bought like 40 of them. Gonna go fill a pediatricians lollipop bowl.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
The hypnotist is here. He has a black eye and smells like tequila.
I want to get business cards and hand them to hot guys and say " hey if you ever want to like makeout and pretend it never happened call me"
I dunno what he did but it both burns and feels amazing to pee
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
Chicks, chicks everywhere, and not a drop to drink. Dude, when did real life lesbians get HOT?
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Got caught peeing in public. Sucks. It was a police station. Sucks worse.
I just tried to lit a bowl with my chapstick.
Perfect attendance and not being drunk since Sunday. This is a new leaf if I've ever seen one
Randomize
