Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
Her vagina should come with caution tape.
Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
Its not monday til someone throws up in the hallway
whatever buzz i had immediately ended when i saw her run through a sliding glass door
if i can get a chik with a dibaetes pump naked a sling certainly isnt going to get in my way
He passed out naked in my bathroom, then took a shower, then passed out again and then took another shower. Last time I let my brother visit.
Whoever brought the pigeon, please come and remove it from my living room.
never underestimate the power of walking into a bar alone in uv cat makeup.. took home a seven foot man
Also, what is a socially acceptable way to introduce a crossbow in public?
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
Dude I am a waste of space, I just febreezed myself so I could go out and get lunch
What do I have to do?! Spell it out for him? Why can't he just plow me and pull my hair at the same time
You are my new hero
If I end up in the hospital remind me to order jimmy johns.
Why?
They deliver.
I am going as Rudolph for the Christmas Eve furry orgie.
Is Santa taking the sleigh of slutty reindeer around the neighborhood again this year.
Yes. Several neighbors have requested it.
Randomize
