he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
Well the party says they're going to have three kegs and four trampolines. I think I'm going to invite my EMT buddies just to be safe.
it's so much work when my dad takes my car to get fixed, i had to take out the bottles, condoms, and my pipe
Hurricane Earl: Get Blown party at my house friday! Byob: bring your own bitch/booze. Must have 80s blown hair style, kazoo/noise maker (vuvuzelas/airhorns are allowed), and/or bubble wands. \n
Why am I even shocked you're doing this....
relax...and go to your happy place, which probably has a lot of dicks
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
Guys, right now i need a picture of a squirrel, preferably with one of you guys but not necessary.
Yes I have a handle on life. A handle of Svedka.
We lost our room key and found it in his pocket with 3 pieces of fish.
But it's ok cause then I turned my tequila blanket into a tequila comforter and I felt no pain
Oh my fucking god how fucking embarrassing never again will I mix drugs at a family barbecue
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Things my liver can't take in one weekend. Surprise nights off at work and male strippers. Woke up jaundiced.
Feel weird saying this on Facebook, but a dildo collecting demigod sounds like somebody I'd at least hang with for a minute.
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