No, you can still breathe under the balls.
he told me not be awkward when his girlfriend comes tomorrow. and then he made out with me
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
Sorry I tried to blow your roommate in your room. I felt more at home there.
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
Tough to say exactly how to play this. I just know people don't like surprises when genitals are involved.
I just Tebowed the shit out of her.
Nice and you can't use "Tebow" in the place of every verb.
It's a never ending cycle of men I've fucked knowing other men I've fucked. I need a new town.
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
Hey can you tell Daniel there's a bottle of Captain Morgan's in the dryer ...
Sorry I think you have the wrong number
Yes it looks like I do
Dude \nSo embarrassed \nJust sent a snap to my boss john and noticed my vibrator was right beside me
Randomize
