I can't watch pbs sober anymore
your profile still reads that you like women...interesting? I think there is some photography and video that will show otherwise
I puked a lego.
do you remember putting condoms over both your hands and asking me if your fists would be too big.
he only lasted 2 minutes. he said it was because i was so pretty. i'm not sure what to feel right now.
Woke up with an epic boner today, the kind where you can spin books and shit on it. FYI: don't try spinning an encyclopedia
he met me at the airport with a welcome home sign with a grilled cheese, PBR and a blow job on it. i missed america.
usual friday morning routine. the pants i wore last night are in my passenger seat and im rooting through the pockets trying to make exact change at the dunkin donuts drive thru
I don't care how sexy you think I look in my scrubs. Wanting a blow job is not a medical emergency.
Oh, also as a concerning side note, my bra had drops of blood on it. So I don't know what the deal was, but someone I was around was definitely bleeding a decent amount.
I saved him in my phone as "Well-Hung Burrito Savior." I love Taco Tuesday.
I hope the lord has blessed you with many tampons, child.
I told him I wanted to fuck him and he hasn't texted me back in 4 days...am I missing something
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I tried to face swap with Chuck Norris. His face was too powerful... it broke my snap chat.
Randomize
