There are babies in the room i shouldnt be high with babies in the room.
I left two shots of jager for you guys when you wake up from your death. Do with it as you wish
not good my parents heard a big thud and found me passed out in the bathrrom abt an hr ago. hit my head arm and side. dont remember. real talk.
These shoes are like walking on sunshine and labias. So soft and squishy
I told the hostess, two bouncers and a manager i was roofied and made them smell my beer. Turns out I just picked up some stupid bitches CHERRY WHEAT beer by mistake. I insisted they replace my lost beer.
I thought 4 percs were too many but I'm dumping Gogurt on apple pie and taking giant bong rips. This feels right.
I'm really hoping to find some quality strange ass tonight while at my court appearance.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
okay i am so sorry that i pulled a knife on you last night but seriously that woman knows how to throw a party.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
I'm smoking a bowl in my bathtub. I'm meant to be alone.
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
He put his number in my phone as Steve handsome
i fucked his best friend. once right next door to him. i'm pretty sure that could be called sweet revenge.
Randomize
