the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
if you don't start talking to me i'm gonna tell your gf that you said she tastes bad
I wish the health center treadmills counted beers burned not calories
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
smoking a bowl while I'm peeing. i love having a big dick.
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
Can't talk right now. I'm doing tequila shots with my professor at some Mexican bar. That's how I prepare for finals.
I woke up with my vibrator in my bed so I'm assuming I had a decent night.
I don't think I used nearly enough fucks in my reply to convey the level of fuck him.
He told me I was a good dog mom. I've never been so turned on in my life
and then after the older sorority girl asked me his name she said "he gave me the rest of his mcdonalds and I decided to go home with him. it was the best that I could hope for my night"
I just found peanut butter between my boobs. This was for you.
I guarantee you he will only fuck with old bitches from now on
Randomize