I'm convinced that Kathy Griffin and Andy Dick are the same person...
Girls are like M&M's, once the lights go out you can't tell the difference.
SO stoned. Sitting in just a thong in front of a fan. NO work for a WEEK! Life is good :)
His facebook status was woke up with a whale ..... Captain AHAB IS BACK !!!!!
I told her she has a very organized vagina; somehow she took offense.
Eventually the creepy theater major quirks will come out. Probably in bed. Like role playing as the Phantom of the Opera
i wish i had the videos of us pissing on him last night.
yeah, that's what i said too. right before i tackled that street sign.
Just got tipped $5 for distracting some dude's gf while he got another girl's number. Bro-code at its finest.
No, the responsible one does not yell out "lets go to iHop" at 5 in the morning to a bunch of drunk people with munchies.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You're invited to our X-games themed party. We have an ice luge and every time someone eats shit we drink. It's gonna be great.
Nothing better then waking up to multiple snap stories of people doing body shots of tequlia off of you
Tent sex on an air mattress requires balance and flexibility. Not for the faint of heart
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