There is a new fb quiz: "are you at ypical woman, future ex or from crazy town" - should i take it?
Aren't all three of those the same though?
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
He lit his shirt on fire at the bar by putting a lit cigarette in the pocket to "save for later."
You have to understand, this is the first time I'm looking at a whopper sober.
I just delivered a ham and cheese to a strip club. you were right this job is not that bad
Apparently, I kept going on about how i'm going to name my first born Ramen. I think this is a good parenting move.
Cops are just so fun an beautifuk
Plus I'm on the toilet and I can only describe it as if someone had kicked the cap off of a fire hydrant.
I'm sending you the three minute video I jus took,....it's of me eating a pear up close
We knew we were dealing with a pro when some random guy at the bar thew you over his shoulder and you still didn't spill your drink
Strangely enough, that's not the first time that's happened
I just accepted my offer to work as a camp counselor over the phone between shots of Fireball. This is going well for me so far.
Theyll love you, its bunch of older ladies who drink whisky and sours and talk about the sex seans in Game of Throwns
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Not drinking until my bday. I know it's only a few days but it feels like when couples get celibate before the wedding and there's all that tension.
My boss just offered me a vodka mixed drink at work I do not have a real job
Randomize
