Take a Tylenol with a HUGE glass of water before you pass out, you'll thank me in the morning.
i dony have tylonal but i had a snickers and popcorn and a bottle of water and i am.. brushing my teeth!
There is somethin about your sexuality that makes my dick do jumping jacks when I see you
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
It's true- you can buy beer at McDonald's in France. I'm not coming back to the States.
Whatever, its basically a crime against humanity to miss an andre power hour so she'll get what's coming to her.
Saying we were separated at birth, got on a ship and sailed here via onion barrel from Somalia didn't help our case at all....
It is scary how often "just flash him" is your advice.
I just saw a commercial for God of War and heard the nickname he gave my vagina.
He talked to you for like two seconds while you were shit faced doing Forest Gump impressions...how is that possible?
I have my vibrator between my thighs and I'm listening to high school musical. That kind of high. We're all in this together.
Trimming my pubes at 1 AM, drunk, listening to Stevie Ray Vaughn. What has become of me.
Jesus christ stop updating me about every aspect of your life.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I woke up to his balls in my face, so naturally I limboed under him and headed to the bathroom. When I came out he was asleep on the floor.
just blew him in the library. I am a classy dame
I need to go to St. Louis more often. The brides sorority sisters were practically fighting over me once they heard I work on Wall St.
Randomize
