trying to fathom saturday night and the fact that Rainn Wilson now hates me. my brain hurts.
coke and sex party at dan's
im watching greys anatomy with megan...
wha-pishhh
so basically i'm the" little sister", he's the "big brother" and we just fucked
i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.
okay. so this hammed chick got arrested and she keeps trying to make out with the cop. i like her style.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
Were making Christian mingle accounts. First one to get laid doesn't pay bar tabs for a month.
Challenge accepted. See you in hell.
You cant come. You're a Colorado native who drinks Bud over Coors. Fucking homegrown terrorist.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
If this nail lady pinches my achilles one more time im kicking her directly in her bedazzled boobs
She looks like a Midwestern news anchor that got fired so she has done nothing but eat for the past 6 months.
I guess I'll just chalk it up as a learning experience and a lot of great sex.
Bacardi 151 is like a past nightmare I'm still curious about
I mean, I've had her boob in my mouth, but is that romance?
He literally said, while inside me, "I would smack your ass but I don't want to wake my mom up". Amazing.
Randomize
