hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
i had just passed the point of no return when my mom opened my door. I hid my dick and took the porn off the computer in time but i still had to explain my day at school to her WHILE i was jizzing in my pants.
well I washed the adderal like an idiot. the capsules broke but the beads inside were intact. so my landlady came in and caught me licking the dryer lint screen
we need to start a braincell conservation fund for you, sort of like save the whales or something.
So yeah she lost her virginity in a wheel chair with a broken pelvis. I'm still trying to figure out how I should feel about that.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
My parents are takin me for chinese food for my 4/20 present.
I fucking hate you.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
What kind of gift says "I'm sorry you accidentally stuck your hands in my puke (even though you should know better by now)"?
But idk if I cried about life then banged him or banged him and then cried. Chicken or the egg?
He thought I was gay. I had to explain I just really like wearing flannel.
I was afraid I was gonna get a URI, so I peed on his front porch.
The heart wants what the heart wants, and once again it’s a guy with brown hair, wears a chain, and has a nicotine addiction.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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