i just had sex. the condom broke. we're sleeping in to separate beds. And im in albany
Masturbating after my cheeseburger. It's unavoidable.
i'm so bored i'm watching porn for fun. not even jacking off or anything. just watching.
she said she was gay. i said prove it. she said "ok i wont fuck you"
I may be Daddy's little princess, but doesn't mean I can't be the blowjob queen.
I always congratulate people on their vaginal emancipation.
It was relaxing until your penis crawled in my ear.
My phone broke again .... im not really sure how im going 2 explain the teeth marks to the ppl at the Verizon store
He's talking about how great of a find these dollar store condoms were. Help.
That man deserves a slow clap... He defied the power of the vagina
You took a selfie with my hard dick and sent it to Scott with the caption 'Toldja'. It was hard to forget you're a teenager after that
Walked in on my roommate covering his dick in blue frosting. Am staying with my folks for the Forth. See you Monday if the brain bleach works.
i thought this was a perfectly normal conversation between two adult men about why this children's cartoon is quality television but no you just gotta be talking shit again
That dick was not the dick of a twenty year old
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
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