im naked on webcam to her boyfriend, but im playing neopets at the same time, so its all evened out
Can we just schedule bi-weekly fucks and bypass all the bullshit?
Down at cameli's and some homeless dude just pulled out a taser. Awesome.
My boss just gave me full permission to come into work wasted this weekend.
Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?
Given my current decline of critical thinking and capacity for speech it's probably best u call the cops
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
at least the person I hooked up with donates to charity, the shirt I was wearing this morning was his relay for life shirt.
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
I've noticed we have slowly begun to phase the "B" out of our Bromance.
Do you think there are other mothers looking at porn in the carpool line?
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
ill be home in an hour. Be in my bed ready for disappointment
It is 5:00PM and I'm just now putting on underwear.
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
