i dont remember who you are as you are in my phone as "mr. peanut."
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
So i literally just wrote sorry on my quiz and turned it in.
You were telling me to give my phone mouth to mouth so it wouldn't die.. Should i be worried for you?
Postcard from jail please. Reserving a spot on my fridge.
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Quesedillas should not make me weep and drinking water should not make me feel like god is giving me mouth to mouth. Never again.
Bad news? she threw her drink in his face, left her phone at the club, and disappeared. I found her laying in bed with the bottle she stole from our VIP service. Good news is she's asleep and I have the bottle, come home
He looks like he's going to feed me a taco and then stab me. It's probably a good idea he's a lawyer
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
You did a body shot out of her belly button with a bendy straw.
Come share oat with me in your robe
I don't remember anything but bad decisions last night
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Charging my vibrator at work. Pray to god I don't forget it!!!
Randomize
