Maybe she gives good head
A girl who still calls a dick a "wiener"cannot possibly give good head
I cant. I'm trying to smell my vagina.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
She was like the Rudy of blow jobs... SO much effort into it
So, your mugshot picture is behind the counter at B-Dubs, with the caption: "not allowed on premesis."
It's like a teen mom casting at the Obgyn's office. I feel great about my positive life decisions.
I gave them the 'I used to fuck your son' discount.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Running my fingers through my hair was like that scene in Patch Adams where the old lady got to swim in a pool of pasta. I love Molly.
"my nose is broken but I'm beer pong champ so it evens out really"
So was it everything you dreamed it would be
I puked.
Twice.
So is that a yes?
So much for no-infidelity-fridays....
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
God damn you Coronavirus! I'm jonesing I got the itch. I would fully satisfy a horse for some Taco Bell or Perkins. God help me I'm going insane but I definitely don't want to get sick.
Randomize
