Is it morally objectionable to repay my debt to society with drug money?
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
I don't think anyone has ever said "boy I'm glad I took those shots of everclear" when they wake up
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
I almost lit my balls on fire tonight.
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
like, by the end of my shift people were asking if I'd sobered up enough to take a drink order yet. that bad.
you asked the cab driver if he wanted to meet your parents, last night.
A friendship for the ages born on how horny we both are
I actually talked to his parents last night about it. haha. I had a bottle of smirnoff in my hand, I'm sure they took me serious.
Have you ever forgotten how to pee? I did last night. Standing in front of the urinal with dick in hand. WTF were we drinking???
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
