dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
It's like God knew that was my ex's best friend and punished me. I've never vomited that much in my life.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just got cockblocked by coyotes. This would happen to me.
IT'S SUMMA TIME
ITS SUMMA TIME NOT BE HIGH ALL THE TIME TIME
THEY'RE THE SAME THING
Maybe her vagina is like a vacuum
I can't decide if that would be a good or bad thing. I'm leaning toward good
However today I got my lube that might I add was dripping out of the box. I'd like to think my mailman was mixing business with pleasure.
She bent over while grinding on me on the dance floor and her thong straps were hanging out, I thought it was a good idea to grab the straps with both hands and pretend to be riding in Santa's sleigh...not my brightest moment.
I have made the descision to sacrifice the first of my family's dogs that wakes me before noon tomorrow. I may quickly become the family outcast
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
No like he has curves. I remember thinking he had a nicer body than me
I just ate the lyft drivers bacon cheeseburger. Well fuck me this night escalated quickly.
Gave her a puke bucket just in case. She filled the bottom of it with tears. Super sad. Although I am super proud she didn't puke. That was a lot of Fireball.
Typically a man doesn't buy a woman a drink in hopes of her laughing at his penis, but no one said I was normal.
I just used a bag of jelly beans as an arm weight...I'm not sure what to think of myself
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