Getting up at 8 this morning to drink could be the best and the worst idea we've ever had
Can you still call it a wet dream if sandwiches were involved?
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
Well, I just watched him puke into his pitcher at the bar, I doubt he cares about anything other than the fact that he needs a new beer.
And then out of the blue she sent me a youtube video mashup of cats puking to techno music
If by "in control" you mean him showing-up to work wasted, calling a customer a "fuckstick," and getting fired on the spot? Then yes, he is.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
I came in and she was laying on the ground just stoking it saying "the floor is where our feet step"
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
Yeah I mean once a gun is being waved around, its probably a good time to leave the party
But the music was sooo good
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Btw I did not technically have a dick in me but I was naked in bed with a man during the last finals game so that is why the Warriors won
At one point, the bartender wrote out the words "please kill me" on some receipt paper and slid it across the bar to me.
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
Randomize
