cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
Home. Hour long discussion with mom. Very frightened. Eating a sausage. Don't remember making it. Confused.
It's ok, I may have just peed outside your car and used your whataburger napkins. Hope you weren't saving them for a special occasion.
I had to watch them play Salty Cracker. I have never seen a grown man cry with a boner before
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Got serenaded to on the streets of Denver...the song was about a young banana that made really big decisions, got stds, and joined a gang. I think I like Colorado
seriously the second he called my tits warlocks was the second I knew I wasn't going to fuck him.
I've orgasmed four times in the past 24 hours. And my mom's dropping off cookies later
He had all the grace of a fucking hippo and the emotional control of a five year old
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
One day he'll find out I do drugs and stop talking to me.
What will you do then?
Drugs, probably.
He pulled out a Plan B pill and handed it to me as I left like it was a party favor. God Bless America.
its liver damage thursday
And, by “make you dinner” I mean “have lots of sex and multiple orgasms.” So you should probably eat something and before you come over
And hydrate too
Randomize
