Let's bang like we're on a Lifetime Channel movie.
arkansas has a gas station called kum and go....story of my life
He just screamed at her, "if you pass out i am still having sex with you!!!" In front of the entire party.
I woke up with the wrong plaid-shirted guy in my bed.
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
If i'm not hungover, near death, and wondering what i did the night before on Monday, life is not worth living.
You know i think she's just using me for sex
I hate you.
I woke up next to her will a oven mit taped to my cock. Dear god, I might have tried to use it as a condom.
Hey did where's my bong?
In the tree out back .... Top branch on the right
Should I bother to ask?
MASS TEXT: who ever dared Todd to suck on the Clorox wipes last night.. good goin jackass. you can come visit him, hes in room 266, AFTER hes done getting his stomach pumped.
HE DARED ME TO DARE HIM... DONT PUT THAT ON ME.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
UHG. i just want to have hot lesbian sex and eat pizza with you.
I thought one was bad but really there are two woman stupid enough to marry our brother...unreal
finals do horrible things to a person. i haven't worn pants since friday
I'm both gender and math confused
Randomize
