theres no cameras in the kitchen right? cause i dont wana get fired for peeing in the kitchen in a cup
How do you politely bring up someone's criminal record?
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
She fucked me because she said I looked like Neil Patrick Harris
Because it is about to snow, I sent him for Diet Coke and cigarettes. It's the gay version of milk and bread.
I gotta stop tellin complete strangers at the bar that they're the godparents to my first born
some gay kid said he wanted to blow him because "his eyebrows told a story"
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
He said bow chicka bow wow. I never thought being sexually degraded would be such a turn on.
Two drag queens are fighting over me. And yet the night is still getting weirder
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
And I mean really who loses their phone in a tree
It finally happened. Some guy just tried to catfish me with my own dick pic. Of course I told him that it was the hottest dick I'd ever seen and that I would do anything for that particular dick.
Had a very good bday. Have the teeth marks and bruises to prove it
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