Milquetoast, coolest word ever.
A friday without alcohol is hardly a friday at all
I got my parents high. They've been watching spongebob for six hours. You cannot tell me I'm not the favorite
party gras won. party gras always wins.
we fucked the fort apart but we'll rebuild it after we get some drinks.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
I just saw a wasted dude crawl out of the road at 2 in the afternoon. Big question- still drunk from the weekend or hitting the soju already?
If she wants experimental lesbian sex, i call dibs
Life is my bitch right now. The bouncers tried to carry me out of the club, but everyone thought I was crowd surfing so everyone carried me BACK IN. Winning as fuck.
I wish I had a picture of me and ron helping that stripper lick her own vagina
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
I'll just bring the big suitcase this trip so I don't have to play wine bottle tetris again.
did you make it home?
i'm in a room and it looks like mine :)
hahah close nuff if it isnt
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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