she asked me if the dress made her look fat, i told her no - the fat made her look fat.
yo im tryna cop a beej tonight
Eric said he heard us having sex the other night. He said i did a great job.
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
dude I heard her through my door. She sounded like you were holding her head under water and they letting her up for air. I recorded that shit
can you explain how you are here for one night and now my kitchen table is in 11 pieces..
In anticipation of No Judgement Tuesday, I believe a Can We LOL At What We Did Last Night Saturday is in order
therea a video of her dad walking in while i screamed "lets have a fashion show!" and fell off the table
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
And then you asked me why my legs were so thick and started measuring them with a ruler
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
so i EARNED it!?! i EARNED dying alone with cats!!?
Evidently I placed three booty calls at the same time...it was an ugly scene. I'm never getting that high again.
Sorry, I gave half my brain to my thesis and the other half to mdma
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
Randomize
