theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
we're talking about where were going. or where we stand. but yeah we'll basically be doing it in the hallway so just ignore us
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
What? Cold floors are soothing when you have a hangover. How am I supposed to pass that up. Even if I'm at my parents house
so i made out with some dude last night at the bar. and some girl just stood there and watched. i felt bad so i made out with her too. She looked like she felt left out.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
Best part of failing a semester of college: not having to buy books next semester. I can drink to that
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
It's raining beautiful colors and I don't know what the fuck is going on
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
Lemme put it this way babe, at point you were naked in Target.
Where were you?
Laughing
You know you're stoned when you tell your dog you're stoned only to realise he's not in the pickup
Sitting in a music store. There is a 40 something year old guy in a track suit, with a boner, and playing the ukelelie quite intensely.
thanks for thinking of me.
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