Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
when your english prof writes "this was a real good paper" on your essay, you know you're at the wrong college
just bought a coffee grinder that advertiesed spacious grinding chamber...new nickname for my bedroom?
Just gave my manager part of my viccodin stash-my job is basically secured forever.
there's unknown territories my dick was not made to discover
There's always time for handjobs
Its only.eleven and we are already chasing a man on a bike with a bag full of burger king
All I got from that conversation with the officer was "blah blah blah, you're disgusting, blah blah blah, $500 fine, blah blah blah, be in court Tuesday."
After this weekend, it looks come this holiday season I'll be walking in a winter abortionland.
it's a drink the shower water kind of morning ...
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
HOW IS IT EARTHLY POSSIBLE TO DO THAT MUCH DAMAGE WITH JUST MY THUMBS?? HOW???
My mouth taste like pussy and my dad noticed. Hahahaha
it's pretty awkward texting you how much I want to suck your cock when I have my mom on speakerphone.
On my way
Just asked my roommate if she needs one of my old pill bottles to hold her weed during our move tomorrow. What has grad school done to me?
Randomize