I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
somehow you got everyone naked by playing strip rock paper scissors.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
I'm always impressed by your drunken ability to quickly gauge how long it's been since you've shaved and whether or not your prospective hook up will care.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
is it bad that upon arriving to my fourth sex toy party the sex toy lady instantly recognizes me?
It was so weird. I had like an out of body experience. I heard the moaning, but I didn't know it was me.
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
he made a bon jovi sex playlist and started crying when "i'll be there" came on... how was your night?
Only you two could pull off a partner swap with honeymooners
Let's have sex in an apple orchard
How do I send someone an apology text for giving them a lap dance in the middle of a party last night?
Why does my nose taste spicy?
How do you know what your nose tastes like?
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
