it's already thursday and i haven't gotten drunk yet...something's not right.
just looked at his mug shot... not really my type
Hahaha alright after 5 shots I'm not allowed to touch glass or boys with girlfriends.
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
I'm sports announcer narrating myself making a sandwich. Your weed wins.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
door buzzer is fixed. took shots with Latvian electrician to celebrate. nice guy. he is gonna bring mixers next time cuz kombucha didn't really cut it for him.
To confirm, you are a grown ass man and you just asked me what her vag looked like.
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Just FYI, by the transitive property my breasts have now touched the Stanley Cup.
How about we just have a naked taco night instead?
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
Saw the guy I once slept with, he was buying Beer and shit tone of diapers. Glad to see how 2016 will turn out.
I can't even be mad at customs in houstons airport anymore for missing my flight and having to stay overnight. Within an hour of meeting we did it at her place. Her last word being "glad I could show you real southern hospitality". I'm definitely coming back here someday
I'm so sorry for trying to eat your puzzle last night...
Randomize
