Why are there hot girls at the dollar store?
The recession has changed everything man.
I didn't say she couldn't, I said you shouldn't.
Life lesson: when driving and throwing up, choose a paper bag over plastic. Fuck my life.
We'll see haha. The cum didn't work...I just chewed the whole thing in a day.
I hope you meant gum...
sweetheart all i remember is you throwing up and saying "i thought things would be better now that barack obama is president"
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
I'm relatively certain my chiropractor just judged me for admitting that my back is misaligned from the sex we had last night...
noo you weren't that drunk. you just knocked the grill over and couldn't get the key in the door, so you climbed through the window. success.
There's a mouse. In the house. By the cans. With some pans. Release the cat. To eat his hat. Sorry about the mess. Of my breakfest.
No but seriously, there's a fucking mouse in the house by the beer cans
Think I can pull off edward 40 hands before class?
You might end up in the wrong class.
I'm a COM major, they're all the wrong class.
They make twin pack pregnancy tests for girls like us
Hot dogs and hydrocodine is NOT the combo of champions
She's started this new thing where whenever she drives by random couples talking alone outside she yells "break up! this is your sign!"
I AM NOT LOSING TO SOME FICTIONAL CROSSDRESSER
I think I need practice at oral sex
I own a practice facility.
Randomize
