Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
Are you for fucking real.? He divorced me just because he got a fucking girlfriend.?!
I took her to see 2012 then broke up with her, the movie was a metaphor.
can't wait for January to be Over so I don't have to see all the fat resolutionists working out.
im in class. still drunk. wearing one sock. eating a breakfast sandwich and trying to make sure this bottle of whiskey doesnt fall out of my purse in front of my professor
I'm either watching Fifth Element or Hotel Rwanda. There's black people and white people and high life tall boy 18 packs are $11.99 so I could be watching my own hand. I have no idea.
If I don't throw up the day I graduate i'll feel like the last 4 years and thousands of dollars spent on alcohol will have been wasted.
i wish you were under my bed. you sexy russian fur trapper.
please. text the right number. youve been sending me these all night.
kool aid jammers and 151...our childhood has officially been corrupted.
That commercial was clearly aspirational. I think Arbor Mist would pair nicely with Oscar Meyer
So this 40 year old woman was trying to bring me into the bathroom to blow me and the bartender called the cops on her because she was showing her tits. Only in asbury.
I think I'm going to add the date I dumped his sorry ass as a life event on FB.
I think that's justified.
Those tiny little fruit fly looking mofos. They fly past the phone and I grabbed them like Daniel-San
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
Plus you need some new dick in your life, the environment is fucked enough you don’t have to recycle anymore 😂💀
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