What I'm saying is Afghanistan is America's sexually contracted disease.
i just farted in a meeting....took me completely by surprise.
so you made the shocked face and they caught you.
yup.
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
Word to the wise: learn how to ask "What is my bail posted as" in French before traveling abroad.
She walked into class late sat down for 5 min muttered 'oh i cant do this' and walked out. She looked like death.
We should party with her soon
please remind me not to sleep with group members until after finals week.
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Some guy stole lobsters by hiding them in his pants. We should strive to be like him.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Dude, she sent me a nude of her posing in the mirror and her dad was in the reflection
Black out Jordan is making huge strides. I didn't even pee on anyone or anything last night.
You finished the fifth and then hid two dozen eggs around your apartment and declare that you would "quest for Jesus". Have fun questing today.
I swear to god if I see a single piece of genitalia I'm driving back to LI and smacking you back to the Italian Renaissance
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
I guess I just don't understand how the two main issues with your ex involve a cock ring and a Christmas tree
Randomize
