Seeya bye Latvian government! Whammy!
Fair warning.. porn on your laptop when you turn it on.. seemed like a wonderful idea last night.. until it died
While she was crying about breaking up, he looked at her through his fork and said "of course she's upset, she's in jail." Having sex with him tonight.
He said he had bite marks on his back... Turns out he had to throw me over his shoulder, and I was really reluctant.
Well, she's officially disappointed in me. I have it writing.
I can only only sleep there on nights I orgasm cause he snores so loud and if he leaves me hanging one more time ill probably cut off his dick from lack of sleep and frustration
Can we please start going to the gym before I accidentally kill someone via explosive fat girl pants button accident
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
I think id rather titty fuck an A cup than deal with what happened tonight again. shits depressing
Oh my god, it's like someone broke the off button in my butthole
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
I need a moral compass that doesn't always point to dick
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
