My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
Just caused a nice traffic jam while trying to park at Costco. Too high to drive.
I showed him my toy collection and he goes, "You won't need those anymore," and dropped his pants. I threw the House of Pleasure out last night.
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
Apparently she broke up w/ her bf like 3 weeks ago. She actually called me to be her bday hookup cause she's single now. Patience- the virtue that occasionally pays off.
Got to use the phrase "sweet pukas dude." My day is made.
I've never known a porn star before
There's not even an emoji for this
No I did a yoga dvd and hit my ex up via email for some pot in exchange for his mail.
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
I started keeping track of my period when I realized you had a better grasp of it than me.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
Are we planning this because I am online looking for places with a Mechanical bull
the D I S R E S P E C T of sending someone nudes, them opening it, and not bothering to respond
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
Randomize
