K, im just throwing this out there, i am not making out with any of his friends... Especially the cross eyed one.
I really want to sleep with her friend. I'm hoping our casual sex relationship will somehow lead to that.
If a cop asks you "Where do you go for fun?", it's not a pick up line...especially if he just pulled you over.
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
he kept his composure pretty well until he puked on the cop car
We had break up sex twice. He said one was cause he had to say goodbye to both tits.
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
Just took 4 secret shots in his bathroom to not remember him naked.
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
You didn't act like you were blacked out yesterday...
I didn't know
Its like bringing all that milkshake to the yard and I'm a diabetic and can't have any
Okay... I just said "preach it" to the pokemon theme song. I'm hammered.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
We did hand stuff while watching teenage mutant ninja turtles so I guess you could say it's getting serious
Randomize
