honey bunches of taint.
after we finished he farted and said 'i've been holding that one in'
hows the new call of duty?
I only had sex with the game case so far, but that part was awesome.
wait do you know what youre gonna say if they ask how youre getting back?
yes. helicopter.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
and the award for most disgusting thing ever done on my couch now officially goes to you! Congratulations, you won the couch...I can't even look at it anymore.
I would have thought, as two of my best friends, you girls could have cought me as I fell out of the shower. There are so many bruises.
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
I like to get drunk just like anyone else but not to the point of sticking a rubber tube up my asshole
Cry into your wine glass and then drink the tears, it's like the fountain of youth
Girl it's 3:30 get your life together and come enjoy a bowl, some coffee and a brownie with me
Like I actually don't feel all that great but the fact that I'm not projectile vomiting at work makes life seem so magical
is it weird that our first time having sex was makeup sex?
I think I just got buffalo sauce on my penis. Is that a turn on or off?
I don't wanna see it, I don't wanna touch it, I just want it in me.
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