Me. At least after what I've been through.
is it mean to send ur x his condoms back because they are too small for ur new boyfriend?
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
Not sure how I feel about St Psts and March Madness being on the same weekend. I feel like I've been screwed out of a drunk holiday.
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
Her only article of clothing is an American Flag
I've thrown up in front of nearly every customer we've had today.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
I told him his only options were from behind or me on top. I was not about to mess up my $80 blow out before graduation.
He had a flex off with himself in the mirror but he thought it was someone else for at least 20minutes.
I started my period on international women's day. It's like the world is congratulating me and punishing me for being a woman at the same time
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