ugh, i have officially sinned in all of my cute clothes. i can't even wear any of them without feeling regret.
I give out O-faces like they're halloween candy
hahhahahha. mid doggie-style, i faked an asthma attack. the sex was that bad
He managed to light the Jello on fire...
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
Definitely Got caught hugging a strangers tree last night with 5 others.
There's a questionable stain on Harley's bed...would they have sex on a dog bed?
Just for the record its a bit awkward when you introduced me to your friends at your house as your brother and then insisted in front of them that I sleep in your bed with you
i mean let's face it...the pregnant girl was really slowing us down.
I usually don't buy birthday presents for my booty calls
But you'll make an exception
probably not
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
I'm to the point where I just want to get back at him in a hot man sex tornado way.
Randomize
