as if moving home wasnt embarassing enough, mom picked up my laundry while i was gone. guess who needs to find a new hiding spot for his cum towel..this guy.
I don't know how much more of summer my liver can take.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
WHY AREWNT YOU HERE SO MUCH FUN STUFF DO IT GET IN CAR NOW caps lock
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
she's a kindergarten teacher now. The teacher desks are the perfect height for fucking. I'm delaying the break up a few weeks.
You should offer shots at parent teacher conferences..I bet more ppl come
and you stopped teaching...why?
I just told him I want him to "take the reins". At least its festive sexting?
I used my tears to chase my tequila. You could say I rallied.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
Did we have sex last night?
No. You laid in my bed and I brought you taco bell.
Then again I went over his house after not hanging out since kindergarten and tried to fuck him so maybe I'm partially to blame here
Conversations really do change when your social worker had your dick in her mouth the other night.
Anyways enough about genital fatigue...
Randomize
