I will fuck a handful of worms if you hold them
Why am I in a dog kennel?
It was for your own safety
If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
Dude I could put my dick between the gap in her teeth.. This is the last time we are hanging out with Kentucky girls
She had her laptop open and there was microsoft word opend and all was written was "no italianoo"
I was pretending that it wasn't happening. Until we had to roll down the windows as she was vomiting apologies into a Target bag.
Can an epipen be used as a tranquilizer ?
im like basted in vodka, i went tanning and it was like i was an alcoholic turkey being cooked in a locker of doom
You peed on someones bathroom floor while saying people are rude for not flushing
I just got back to our room ....neither of us spent the night there but both our beds are occupied. send help.
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I grinded with the guy who brought the scooter, I'm leaving with success
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
Randomize
