just so you know, the whole club saw your tits last night. and booed.
It was like his mom forgot to breastfeed him and he was making up for lost time.
My 11 year old cousin is wearing a Jane Austen fan club t shirt. I'm trying not to tear into her, but I'm five coronas deep and losing control.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
For the amount I put out, I should be going on way more dates.
at which point I apparently ran in and shouted "I made the sex with that one!"
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Woke up and there was a kayak in the pool. Are you alive?
this is you don't wonder off at 3 am with no pants on. Just stay there and pray to god you don't get arrested for being on school property.
She has puke on the back of her shirt not quite sure how the hell she did that
Isn't it my whole life blown into this perfect spoon shaped piece of melted and artificially colored sand?
Wow.
You'll be happy to know that the bruise is gone from my cock
Also I’m on 3%. Just Incase.. I miss you and I love you and you’re my everything and I’m getting drunk.
Are you still in his room?
Nope, yogged home at 8 am with one shoe on.
You're like a care bear with a big cock & a sexual prowess that would put the mighty Thor to shame.
Randomize
