But regardless, you really stood out last night, you should give me a chance
Sorry but you seem like a potential womanizer
i just used a urinal to avoid climbing stairs, i need to quit drinking.
We owe the rent and you're unemployed...you're in no financial position to flirt with cocaine addiction.
but what if he tries to talk dirty to me with the lisp?
i need a wealthy benefactor or a cocktail job. or to start stripping. or kill myself. whatever.
and i was just like oh shit i'm getting felt up by a 15 year old
Sudue. BIG CUP LOTS OF NOMNOMD TUOSPY
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
Every time you come over you bleed on everything. I'm not calling Verizon again asking if blood is considered water damage.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
She thought that based on the way she feels that she got drugged last night, but come on, her turn on word is hello, who needs to drug that??
I feel like I got hit by a bus. A head on collision with my vag.
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
STOP PUTTING PICTURES OF JONAH HILL IN MY KITCHEN CABINETS!
My roommate taped his phone to the ceiling fan to simulate walking so he could hatch Pokémon. Lazy people will always find a way.
Randomize
