How long do you need to date somebody until it is acceptable to fart in their presence?
The real question is how long do you need to date them to dutch oven them?
I've already planned a drinking game for mtvs jersey shore....jagerbomb everytime they do
Sitting in the library lobby in the middle of exam week. Drunk. Dressed as santas slutty helper. Waiting for the student shuttle service. People are clapping for me as they walk by. Tell me how this isnt college
brittany murphy hurts far more than michael jackson, patrick swayze, etc because i never masturbated to any of those other people
dude she was so drunk she thought Jim Joyce made the right call
I need to stop fucking people before I get to know them
So i was told that i peed in the sink, had sex with a pillow and banged on a washer while singing idian chants
It's like I opened a door and behind it lay mythical creatures sprinklin fairy dust upon the land leading me to a pot of gold. And that gold is some delicious cock.
You're the Michael Phelps of my vagina. Most decorated Fuckolympian of all time.
Am I going to be on condom boxes?
You definitely in your drunken state were really concerned you would forget to buy milk today
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I'm standing at the bottom of the driveway w a sign that says plow me
I asked to see his balls for medical purposes.
You went to pound town last night and chow town this morning. Boy you need a passport.
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